to my first love // Christmas 2018

My GOD is AMAZING. My GOD is POWERFUL. BEAUTIFUL. MAGNIFICENT. AWE-SOME. He is full of LOVE. MERCY. FORGIVENESS. He is LIGHT to my darkness. He is HOPE to my hopelessness, my despair. He has opened my eyes and shown me things I'd never dreamed of seeing and understanding! He has brought me out of the pit I dug for myself and set me on solid ground. He has FREED me. He has broken my chains. I am NO LONGER A SLAVE!!

My GOD is CREATIVE. My GOD is CARING. He gave us beautiful, breathtaking, new sunsets and sunrises each and every day and beautiful creation that sings His praises when He could've easily made everything black and white! He gave food with such unique, enticing and delicious flavors when He could've made everything bland and the same!! He gave 100 billion+ stars each a name and placed them in beautiful patterns in the night sky. He made every cell in the human body to work in harmony with each other, every cell playing a part. Every part was planned and thought out and necessary. Nothing is merely a "left over!" Life is no accident!! This is no mistake! Everything around us - this is the work of our CREATIVE GOD. He knows how many hairs are on my head and knitted every human in their mother's womb. Every person is fearfully and wonderfully made, beautifully unique. There are no two exactly alike. This is a GOD of creativity!

My GOD is LOVING. SACRIFICIAL. PURSUING. I will sing praises and songs of His love day and night!! This is the God who saved me from my sin, darkness and despair. This is the God who saved me from my self-doubt, insecurity, and countless other things. This is the God who transformed me from a fearful, doubting young girl to a courageous young woman of GOD. This is the GOD who saves us from self-destructive thoughts, depression, fear, sin, anxiety - everything Satan tries to enslave us in! This is the GOD who chased me down amidst my failures and sin and anger, because He wanted me. He saw something in me I don't see in myself. I saw myself as unworthy, sinful, hopeless, unwanted...but this is the GOD who sees me as beautiful!! Loved!! Gifted! Blessed! This is the GOD who never leaves me, even when I leave Him. This is the GOD who forgives me after I sin the same sin for the millionth time that month. This is the GOD who filled me with LOVE. JOY. HOPE. This is the GOD who I will praise all the days of my life!! This is the GOD I will serve!! I gave my life to Him. I will continue to give it up for His name because He is WORTHY.

This is the GOD, the one and only true GOD, who sent His Son as a baby to be born in a manger, surrounded by dirty shepherds, hunted by King Herod, despised by His hometown and by Jews, who was mocked and beat and scourged for my sake. Who died so I could have life. But who rose from the grave so I could have everlasting hope. So I could have freedom. Eternity with Him. This is the GOD whom we worship and praise today. This is the reason we celebrate Christmas.

But tomorrow, I will continue to praise you, my GOD and my Savior. I adore you and love you and worship and praise and honor you. I don't deserve you. Thank you for everything, everything, you have done for me. Thank you for your reckless love. You are AMAZING. To my first love and keeper of my soul - I LOVE YOU, GOD!!

xoxo, Emma