"I was brutish and ignorant; I was like a beast towards you. Nevertheless, I am continually with you, you hold my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will receive me to glory.
I was born with a passion. I had a passion for people, which grew into an even deeper passion for Jesus after I became a Christian. I don’t like the thought of giving up. I don’t like the thought of giving in to the devil because I didn’t try. I want to be a doer, not a thinker. I want to make a difference. I’ve gone through many trials in life and I believe God uses those trials to help me understand people. And I can. I see all these needy people and I want to do something. But I don’t know how. I don’t have the courage to say hello. I’m afraid of what people will think. But the Holy Spirit is in me and He helps me get past those fears and He guides me in what to do and say. He is there with me every step of the day. God is my refuge. He is my strength. I am His servant and I will do what He says!
I have goals in life. I have goals to help people. I want to guide them to Christ. I want to be a light to everyone I meet. I am willing to do anything for Him who died for me. I am ready. I can’t wait any longer.
Because I am tired of waiting. I am tired of telling myself, “Emma, we’ll do this when you’re an adult, so you’ll be readier.” I am tired of putting off the little things so that I can help with bigger things. I am tired of being a thinker and not a doer. This is not who I was meant to be. This is not who God created me to be. I am not supposed to wait around. What if I die tomorrow? What if those I love die tomorrow without a chance to be a Christian? I don’t want to wait for the perfect opportunity to come to me. From now on, I’m going to take every opportunity that comes my way. I’m going to live for Him and I’m not going to back down. Satan will put obstacles in my way. Satan can lie to me, put me down, and use others to try to make me give up, but I’m not going to be defeated any time soon. And this is not going to be Emma making a difference- it will be Christ, who lives in me. I am His. I am His. I am not my own. This is my commitment. This is my goal, and this is what I am going to do. Nothing will stop me if this is God’s plan for me.
I will start with the little things. I am willing to start by picking up trash. I am willing to be humbled for the sake of Christ. Someone has to do the small things. And I am willing. God will give me the strength. He will be with me no matter what. I am going to be focused more on the eternal than the present. I don’t want those who aren’t believers to go to Hell and I don’t want them to die without knowing where they’ll end up, without knowing Jesus. I am not about to let my family die without knowing Him! And I am not about to let anyone who isn’t a Christian die without Jesus! I am ready!
This is why I get angry when others complain that “it’s too cold” or “I’m too tired” or “Well, she/he doesn’t want to do it” or “it’s not possible” when there are people’s lives on the line! We can’t just lay back and let someone else do it! There is no one else! God wants to use you! This is why I burst into tears when people say no to opportunities like this! This is why I am, literally, in tears right now, sobbing, as I write this down! This is important to me! This should be important to every single Christian that is out there! I don’t want to just stand around waiting! I want to do something! I was not meant to just sit on a couch doing schoolwork! Sometimes I just want to yell at people to WAKE UP! We can’t let them die without knowing Jesus! This is more important than anything else in this world! I want to spread this fire that is in me and I don’t want to wait. I want to be trained in sharing the gospel. I want to learn to be ready in any and every circumstance. I want to be able to say yes the moment God tells me something. And I am not going to wait any longer. I am willing. I am His. I will not give up and I will not give in. This is my goal in life; this is my calling. God’s will be done.
"I have said these things to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation, but take heart;
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"I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all of my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds."